I've made this trip more times than I can count on my fingers. Nashville, TN to Tower, MN. 18-hour drive or a flight that connects in Minneapolis and then a tiny little puddle-jumper from Minneapolis to Duluth. After Duluth is about another hour of driving. But as I sit here in the Minneapolis airport staring at an airplane smaller than some cars i've been in, I can't help but think that this time the trip is different.
This has been a week of goodbyes. Seeing high school friends before they leave for college, wrapping up my internship, and hugging my brothers and sister and parents before I leave for a couple months. It's gradually becoming clear to me that it's time to say goodbye to Nashville, as well. Sure, i'll be back in two short months, but it won't be the same as before. There will be no friday night football games, no impatiently waiting in the lunch line, no napping during study hall, and my friends won't be around to hang out with on the weekends. I'll watch my younger siblings and my parents bustle about, carrying on with business as usual, but I wont be a part of it. I'll be an observer. An outsider, even. Watching them scurry about in the little suburban Nashville world that I used to be a part of.
Will I miss it? Yeah, a little bit. But I don't necessarily want Nashville to always be home. I'm not sure if i really want anywhere to always be home. I don't want to feel that I have to come back anywhere or come and check up on anyone. My home will be wherever my family is, wherever my friends are, and wherever I want to roam.